October Awareness Month: The Mysterious Case of the Missing Purple Ribbons

Awareness Month is a monthly feature on The Fish Bowl in which I find a topic, a cause, or a movement that has a month designated toward the awareness of its existence and write a blog on my thoughts about it.

Where did the month of October go?  I LOVE October, for so many reasons.  Then I wake up from my nap today and think, "It's the LAST day of October!" which means that I need to actually get around to my October Awareness Month Post, especially since this is my most passionate awareness movement.  Are you thinking that it's Breast Cancer?  Nope.  Believe it or not, October is also the home for many additional causes (even if the commercials and the t-shirts and the pink eye sores make it hard to believe otherwise) including:

Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Funny thing, I am too busy studying domestic violence at school to write a post to raise awareness about it.  I know the irony is killing me.  That being said, I'm going to be short (lucky you, because I literally have HUNDREDS of facts and statistics about violence that would hopefully make you passionate about it too, but I won't make this a literary paper).  Mostly. I think the meat of the matter, concerning statistics, has already been said over at Feminist Themes on their post about Domestic Violence Awareness Month, so you should check that out.
The fact of the matter is, I'm kind of sick of breast cancer taking over October.  Don't get me wrong, I heartily support research for all forms of cancer.  Statistically speaking from my family's medical history, I will probably get breast cancer.  In fact, I could probably get breast cancer 100 times before Jon would ever even raise his voice at me in anger, so why should I worry about domestic violence more than breast cancer?  Because the majority of women do not have that assurance and 2 million women each year are beaten so badly by their partner that they will need to be taken to the hospital.  1,300 of them will not survive.  
I am tired of the 'popularity' that breast cancer has received because if there was ever a group that needed the social support more than what is being offered to breast cancer survivors, it is battered women.  I don't mean to detract from the harrowing experience of cancer, I just mean to point out that most women who have it can turn to family for support and if they don't have family at least they can turn to their community.  Battered women often don't have these support systems because their abuser is their family and their community stigmatizes them.  
I know I've missed my window by a wide margin, because we are a mere four hours away from November, but I thought I'd just put it out there (even though this is not my most articulate attempt at trying to invigorate people toward the cause of domestic violence, by any means).  But let me just leave you with this one last thought:  Let's not spend time judging or condemning people for the seemingly bad choices they've made that we don't understand.  True, women do not choose to have cancer but they do choose their relationships, but this is not a valid reason to withhold support.  This issue is in dire need of support and awareness because women can choose to change by removing themselves and their children from violent households.  They need professionals to fight for their cause just as cancer victims have doctors and researchers.  I didn't see a single purple ribbon this October, but every time I walked on campus, saw a commercial or even opened up Picnik, pink was glaring in my face.  Maybe next year some of you will wear purple ribbons right next to your pink ones.  Let's share the cause.  Maybe you will pass a quiet and withdrawn woman on the street and the sight of your purple ribbon fills her with such hope and comfort that she is inspired to leave her abuser.  You never know.

Don't underestimate the power of love and understanding.  

Full on Double Rainbow

Jon and I love Halloween.  Since we 'began dating' at my Halloween party Sophomore year of college, it kind of goes without saying that we love this holiday.  I was Posh Spice (I had 4 other roommates, all the other Spices) and Jon was a Cereal Killer (cereal box with sword through it).  I was immediately smitten with his subtle and intriguing humor.  Since we've been married, we've kind of prided ourselves on our 'inside joke' kind of Halloween costumes.  We really love being clever and funny, even though most people don't seem to really get them. 
Our first year of marriage we were 'Assault and Battery' (I was a salt shaker and Jon was a battery).
Our second year of marriage we were Octomom and her fertility doctor.
This year we were a FULL ON DOUBLE RAINBOW, based on the viral video of the guy who was really excited to find a double rainbow in his front yard.

Exhibit A:

This is the original video that the rainbow guy made that created all the splash on youtube.  I think around minute 1:43 he starts crying.  Priceless.

Exhibit B:

This is the video that made Jon and I want to be double rainbows this year for Halloween.  It's like that video of the rapist in Lincoln Park.  It's catchy and fun, so you just can't get it out of your head.  That's a recipe for true love.
 

Exhibit C

An additional song that someone made based on the video, for your joy and joyness. Ha!

So we debuted our costumes tonight and those who had seen the videos thought they were great, those who hadn't seen the video thought we were a little weird or said things like "Oh pretty rainbows".  Hee hee. My favorite comment from the night: "Is that some sort of statement for gay marriage?"

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Frivolous Friday: I NEED HELP!

Frivolous Fridays are a semi-weekly segment on The Fish Bowl that spread some priceless silliness of life (and the internet) to get you geared up for a care-free and joyful weekend.  Generally, they have absolutely no point or reason for existing.  Enjoy!

So I have had 3 or 4 Frivolous Friday posts stored in my Queue for WEEKS now!  What can I say, I am amused by the silliest things in life, so Frivolous Friday posts come very easily for me.  So needless to say, I have been looking forward to posting one of them for a while.  But THEN Jess over at How About Orange had to go and post a link to possibly the funniest site that I have ever visited.  So there you have it, the inspiration for today's post.  Those other hilarious things I have stored in my blogger dashboard will just have to remain anonymously un-posted for weeks, possibly months, longer.  Just like the draft of my thesis I'm supposed to be working on right now instead of wasting time on the internet.

HELP I NEED HELP

for all of your non-physical ailments in life. 

My favorites:

Help, I hate my roommate.

Their solution:

 (Click link above and he shivers)

Help I don't know what to be for Halloween.

Help I don't know where I am.

Help I fear confrontation.

Help I'm worried I left the stove on.

McKeans Takin' the Midwest by Storm

WARNING: This post will consist almost entirely of photographs.

This past weekend we had the McKeans out to visit and we saw EVERY CORNER of Ohio, or at least it felt like it!!

The first thing we did following Jon's test on Friday afternoon was head down to the Circleville, Ohio for the annual Pumpkin Patch Festival.  It was full of lots of FRIED pumpkin FUN!

PUMPKIN FESTIVAL FOOD:

From top left: Pumpkin brownies, pumpkin cheesecake, pumpkin ice cream, pumpkin donuts, pumpkin waffles, pumpkin pretzels, pumpkin pizza, pumpkin Louisiana BBQ, pumpkin ice cream, and pumpkin funnel cake!

On Friday night, after all the fun of Circleville, we stayed up late enough to head over to Worthington for donuts at Snyder's Bakery.

Then on Saturday the boys went to the OSU football game and the girls went Halloween decoration shopping:

On Sunday we went to church, the Temple, Thompson library and the gym on campus, my office in Campbell, Jon's classroom/study rooms, and the first LDS meeting house in Columbus. 

 

On Monday we drove to northern Ohio to check out the Amish country that Jon and I had never been to.  It was an amazingly beautiful drive.  Kind of solidifying the creeping desires I have had in recent years to move to a rural community.  

When we arrived in Walnut Creek we went to the cheese factory first and I, the lactose intolerant non-cheese-iest person in the whole world, loved it!  There were endless rows of cheese, cheesecake, cream cheese, etc. to try.

Then we headed to a gourmet chocolate factory.  Super ritzy, a bit out or price range, but very cool nonetheless.

On the drive home we stopped at Ohio's longest covered bridge and got some wonderful photographs of the fall leaves.  It was supposed to be raining by this time, but the storm held off for the rest of the day which allowed us to get some great pictures.

And a trip to see the Amish wouldn't be complete without some AMISH!

(Their buggies have WORKING blinkers!!)

So now that this post is really long, some randomness:

Possibly my favorite picture of Jon.  Ever.

Now that I know it exists, I definitely need one.

Hmm, okay.  This was on our drive home.  Brave man, considering the forecast.

I was seconds away from choosing a name.  I have to try REALLY hard to not become the crazy cat woman.  Really hard.  But if I am ever a widow, no promises.

Love at first sight.

This wallet caught my eye, of course, but I had reservations about how big it was.  Then  I opened it up and was a goner.  The orange sealed the deal and there was no use fighting it.

I don't think, for anyone's sake, that I can keep going with this post.  Sorry to have dragged it out so long but it's just because we had SO MUCH DANG FUN; the weekend definitely wasn't short-blog-post material!  Thanks so much to Jon's parents for coming out to Ohio even if their children are master saboteurs (*wink wink*).  If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times: We'd LOVE more visitors.  There are never enough visitors.  Yes, we're looking at *YOU*!

Love Affair of the Moment: Neil Patrick Harris, Part 2

Love Affair of the Moment is a semi-regular feature on this blog in which I confess something that I am madly in love with at this point in time in my life.  I hope I can educate people about some of the awesomeness in this world so that we can relish in the awesomeness together. 

 Remember that post about how I am in love with NPH?  And remember how in my first Love Affair post I said that my affairs are often fervid but short lived?  So did you think that by now I'd be done with my obsession with Neil Patrick Harris and have moved on...?

Definitely not.

Hump Day

Today is an especially significant hump day because it is also the hump week of the quarter.  That's right, I'm smack dab in the middle of my Fall Quarter.  Half way done with this week.  Half way done with this quarter.  Half way done with graduate school.
As is typical for this time in a graduate student's life, my professors kind of want proof that I have actually DONE something this quarter.  The Reckoning.  So yah, hump day/week/quarter kind of sucks.
Thus, in lieu of a real post (I am trying to graduate, after all), I leave you with the awesomeness that are the following youtube treasures.

My number one favorite video of the moment.  When I graduate I think I might actually dedicate my life to perfecting the art of Irish Hand Dancing.

 

"OOOOh!  Why did I need coffee nooooow?!"  No one should have robbed this lady.

 

An actual training video for Wendy's employees back in the '80's.  Secretly sad that I missed out on experiencing this decade first hand, consciously. 

I just like this video because it's kind of twisted but funny.  Apparently you have to do more than kill a kitten to be evil.  That's what she thought.

 I secretly watch this show and fantasize this exact thing happening to me.  Good for them.  Livin the dream.  The wonderful dream of game shows.  To be rich without doing anything worthwhile.  Sigh.

Sensational Sunday

Because I didn't want to wait until Wednesday to post this

source

Thinking on Mortality

Mortality is on my mind.  I have been thinking about this the last few months, and it seems the more you think about it the more you see and hear things around you that make you think about it even more.  First it was my grandpa's terminal cancer diagnosis at the beginning of the year, then it was the tragic death of Yeardley Love, then it was the string of books I have read for family/friend bookclubs as well as for personal interest (namely, Where Men Win Glory: The Odyssey of Pat Tillman, The Book Thief, Chasing Daylight, Embracing Coincidence and Goodbye I Love You), then it is all the statistics I learn in school, then this past week it culminated with my grandpa willingly and peacefully letting go of this Earth.  The funeral is tomorrow and I am not there.

One thought that has kept re-occurring to me over the months is kind of a silly thought, but I cannot keep from thinking about death from the context of an 'English Major'.  That is to say, I keep thinking about how basic literature plot teaches us that protagonists don't die.  And I think it's safe to say that we all view ourselves as the 'protagonist' in our own lives (hopefully you're not your own antagonist, although I am sure that is up for debate in some people's lives).  So who, in the face of a life-threatening situation or a terminal disease, really thinks that they're going to die a tragic, prolonged or even premature death?  Despite how fragile our human condition is, I believe our minds have a very hard time wrapping around the idea of our own frailty, and especially our own mortality.  I think this condition is compounded and certainly augmented by the fact that we are so inundated with media (we watch so many movies, television shows, etc.) that confirms this state of mind in all of our lives.

Protagonists Don't Die.

I can literally imagine myself presented with my own death, either in a scary life-threatening situation or sitting on the crinkly paper at the doctor's office, frozen with the idiotic thought: "This can't be how I am going to die.  It's just too early/hopeless/heinous/anti-climactic/unbelievable/sudden (practically INSERT any word here, depending on the context) to be the ending to my life.  These things do happen, but not to me."  However, I think this mentality could mostly be due to my age, so maybe blaming the media is premature.  Perhaps it is not outside influences, but simply age and life experiences that influence our opinions towards death.  What I witnessed in my grandpa's death was a willing and anxious transition and I can attribute this to his sense of 'fulfillment' that he had lived a full life, while very few people my age would consider their life as 'complete'.

But is that sense of accomplishment at the end of a life actually subjective?  In my opinion:  Absolutely.  There are many older people, older than my grandpa was, who are unprepared and unwilling to die.  There are even a select few who are very young that are content with early death (Katy in Embracing Coincidence is a striking example).  All I can think about is:  How do I gain my grandfather's peace toward death?  Do I just have to wait to get older, or can I actively live toward accomplishing a meaningful death starting today?

Here are 6 ways I think we can work toward achieving a purposeful transition from this life:

• A Positive Life Before a Positive Death.  Positivity is one of my strengths, according to yet another Personality Profiling Test.  I am currently trying to use positivity as a jumping-off point for many goals in my life:  Life accomplishments, personal health issues, interpersonal relationships, practice in times of plenty for times of trial, attracting abundance, deepening the bonds with my husband, etc..  I believe that the act of choosing to be happy brings a deeper element of gratitude into life because some days you have to look harder than others for the things that bring you happiness.  It's my belief that if we live with positivity as a habit each day of our lives, we will maintain that same positive attitude in the face of death.

• Stop Seeing in Black and White.  I've had the opportunity to be raised by a woman with remarkable intuition and spiritual connectedness.  Through her experiences, I have learned to view the world as more permeable than most people.  I have had many personal experiences with angels, spirits, or whatever name you choose to assign to them that has led to my belief in the thinness of the veil and my absolute knowledge of those on the other side who are attentively waiting to help and guide us on our journeys.  When we allow ourselves to feel a connection to 'the other side', life and death no longer become mutually exclusive.  Belief in death as a life, after this life, makes death a transition rather than an ending.

•  Forgiveness is Essential.  'A few cliche statements right here about forgiveness being the antidote to poison'.  I think this relates back to my first point on happiness.  Forgiveness is essential to happiness, happiness is essential to positivity, positivity is essential to gratitude, gratitude is essential to a full life, a full life is essential to a meaningful death.  It all begins with forgiveness.  Not everyone can die of cancer and have time to reconcile old fall-outs and hurt feelings.  If you want to be at peace, forgiveness of others and self on a daily basis is a way to clean the slate each day and capitalize on the moments and people in life that matter.

•  Love Deeper. The typical advice on death, which bothers me, is 'live each day as if you were dying'.  Pretty blase isn't it?  Well if that were the case, I would stop paying my bills and fly to Figi.  So I can't really live as if I am truly dying, because then I might end up as a homeless person.  But we can tell those who are closest to us what they mean to us more often, with no life-style altering (and homeless-inducing) repercussions.  I can pretend that each time I say "I Love You" could be the last time, or each time I say mean-spirited words... could also be my last.  Words are so powerful, I want to make sure they are only ever used to reassure those I love of the depth of my love.  If death comes early or quickly, it's all they need to know anyway.

• Like it or Not, You Will Face the Unknown.  This one is for my personal benefit.  Goodness knows I love my checklists and excel spreadsheets, but Heaven knows I'm not going to be able to Google Calendar my own death.  Holding on to a spurious belief that death is actually within our control only closes off the possibility that it will be a meaningful experience because (unless it falls within our specific parameters) we will go kicking and screaming that it "WASN'T PART OF THE PLAN!"  In essence, it is the plan.  It is the only thing about this life that is guaranteed.  "And come he slow or come he fast, it is but Death who comes at last."--Sir Walter Scott 

• Fear is the Opposite of Faith.  If too much time is spent dwelling on the mystery of death in misery and dread, the possibility of wonder and awe have been removed.  The mentality in which a subject is approached is as meaningful as the subject itself, and anything in life can be given a positive or negative outlook depending on the person.  Denial, as I commented on earlier in this post, does not help anyone.  All it does is put a stopper in the bottle of your own personal growth.  Faith in an afterlife is the crux of why a death should matter at all.  If we fear the afterlife then we cannot truly have faith in its existence.

Oh no, another post-turned-journal-entry.  Maybe this philosophy will help someone somewhere.  If anyone has their own thoughts concerning death they would like to share with me, I'd love to hear them.

  

Exact source unknown, picture is a post card from Post Secret.

Love Affair of the Moment: JACK KICK-A** BRISTOW

Love Affair of the Moment is a semi-regular feature on this blog in which I confess something that I am madly in love with at this point in time in my life.  I hope I can educate people about some of the awesomeness in this world so that we can relish in the awesomeness together. 

Jon and I finished watching Alias last night (this morning).  If you don't know what I'm talking about, Alias is a pretty cool TV show with slightly better potential than follow through.  However, it gets under your skin and it eats away at your ability to concentrate on anything else throughout the day because you can't stop thinking about it.
There are a lot of things about this series that made it AWESOME, to name a few:

The Costumes:

 The Bad Guys:

The Good Guys:

but nothing can top this guy:

 dude.

So, let's face it Alias fans:  This series would have been absolute crap without Jack Bristow keepin it real.  This man is the most lovable sociopath grandpa in the world and his continual hard-core-ness rocked the very foundations of my world.  I began fast-forwarding until his face popped back into frame because the storyline just didn't seem worth it without him in it. 

HE CAN EVEN ROCK AN OSAMA BEARD:

Some of Jack's most ridiculous moments of pure awesomeness on the show:

Want more yet?
Jack's final scene in the series is epic.  If you want to see it, you'll just have to watch the series.  But I wouldn't recommend doing it in 3 weeks, the way Jon and I did.  It's kind of hard to squeeze in 70 hours of a tv show into 3 weeks.  But let's see you try to stop, once you see Jack Bristow in action.  I dare you.

P.S. from the imdb Trivia page:

The character 'Jack Bristow' was ranked #29 in TV Guide's list of the "50 Greatest TV Dads of All Time" (20 June 2004 issue). 

Ummm, that should be Number 1 actually.  But Jack Bristow just looks at rankings like this and they scatter in terror, so it's all good.